I am not looking for a handsome prince charming who will save me from my tower or a superhero who will take me to another world. As long as you've got a long shaft, we'll get along!

Boredom is slowly killing me. I have nothing to do, and its starting to bother me more every single day. I hope to find a man who can keep me occupied and will make my time worthwhile.

If you're looking for a slightly alcoholic psychopath girlfriend who has no filter, eats too much, and will highly likely beat the crap out of you at Super Smash Bros, then here I am.

I love playing chess. The game doesn't allow you to undo any moves, but you can make the next step better. It's just like how real life works. Stop trying to fix the past and start making a better future.

A woman who's sweet on the outside and naughty on the inside. Only men who are worth my time and attention are welcome to enter my secret world. A hunky dude with a dick larger than mine is what I am looking for!

No, your eyes are not broken, dear. I really have the natural face and body of a living goddess. If only I could have changed my name, I would choose Athena, but I thought that having a name and a body of a goddess is a bit redundant.